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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Anna's LiveJournal:

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Thursday, November 1st, 2007
4:37 am
I need an outlet and a sublesser. I get woken up once again by my roomates comming home drunk and then preceding to invite people over at 3:30am. Its impossible to get any sleep in this house, all of my assginments are shitty, I am so distracted by stupid things and messed up sleep patterns that I missed a quiz in my online class. All I want to do is sleep because I am so stressed out. I'm not asking for much just for people to be quite on a night when I have classes. Its now almost 5am, 3 hours after I orginally planed to lay down to sleep. I can't say anything though because I am ostricized for wanting to sleep, hell I am ostrazied for everything I do in this house. I need to move out, but I signed a fuckin year long lease. grah
4:25 am
Female Subleaser needed for Spring 2008 Semester
I am looking for a female to sublease one room in a 4 bedroom house located across the street from Offenhauer.The lease runs through May of 2008 with the possibility of renewal. Monthly rent is $248.75. All utilities including digital cable, DVR, and high speed wireless internet are split 4 ways. The house has an onsite coin washer and dryer. Parking for 4 cars is located in the back of the house. You will be sharing the house with 3 other girls who like to have alot of fun. Please contact Anna at abreith@bgsu.edu or 614-226-6234 if interested
Friday, September 14th, 2007
10:37 pm
Grad School
OMG so I was researching graduatate programs and came across the Environmental Justice Degree Program at the University of Michigan. Not only is this one of the few Environmental Justice Programs in the country it offers a Phd in the disiciple as well. To top it off, Arun Agrawl whose work I used extensively while conducting research in Kenya is one of the Faculty. YAY!!!!!!!! Wish me luck at getting in :-D
Wednesday, September 5th, 2007
4:11 am
I'm having a panic attack...... great..... anyone have some xanax?
Tuesday, September 4th, 2007
1:19 pm
Blogging
I think I am going to start bloggin again. Everyone ok with this?
2:36 am
awkward
Its been a while since I have posted in here, almost 6 months I think, but I think for the sake of those around me to write out my feelings as opposed to alienating those around me through my continous over-azalzing of situtations. Anyways.... ever wondered what its like to be living in the aftermath of an awkward situation.... welcome to my life, or at least my week. For those of you who do not know, I consider myself to be extremely awkward, espically around the opposite sex, and try my best to avoid situations which put me this position at all costs but sometimes fate wants to toy with me and I have to just play along. So here's the deal.... there is this boy (yea Anna is having boy issues again big deal) who after coming home with me one night and falling out of my life last semester (despite my intese efforts) winds up in all of my classes this semester. After having him flake on me several times last semester and spending the summer in Alaska, I thought I had pretty much wiped my hands of feelings for him.... I was wrong. After spending several days hanging out together and confusing myself even more I discovered that feelings were still there and there might be something on the other end as well. So what do I do.... I say something. Trying to avoid an awkward situation I try to lighten the mood by saying "lets make out again" not meaning it in full, but kinda a light hearted way of asking is there anything here or should I move on to greener pastures. And whats his responce........ "I want to get to know you better" WTF? The whole purpose of the conversation was to clear up confusion and now I am left even more confused. To top things off this certian someone forgets to call me tonight after seeming cool the morning after "the conversation". GRRRRRRR I am so confused. On one hand the idealist in me wants to believe what he said, that he was not giving me a line and that he truely likes me and wants to respect me as he said he did, on the other hand a part of me feels like I am getting played again and someone is trying to let me down easy. grrr. Why can't everything be simple?
oh well i am whining
Thursday, February 1st, 2007
4:51 pm
Grah
Why will no one hire me?
Monday, January 29th, 2007
7:34 pm
Depressed
I want to curl up into a little ball and not think about anything. Maybe cry myself to sleep too. I dunno why I am so depressed right now and apathetic too. I have shit to do for tomorrow, but I don't want to do it. I am exhausted yet got 12 hours of sleep last night. Maybe I'll just lay down for a bit and see if I feel better.
Wednesday, January 24th, 2007
3:35 pm
Stuff
So back in good ole BG taking classes and spending money. Trying desperately to get away. I don't know what it is, but this place makes me negative, very negative. I have been really apathetic lately, sitting in my room, waiting for people other than the usual few to call, but yet I don't feel like picking up the phone and calling anyone either. I need a job, but no one is hiring. I spend days anxiously searching job sites, trying to find the dream internship for the summer, but alas none of the ones I want ever pay or I not qualified, or I am too scared of rejection to even apply to them. I think that is it. I have it in my mind that the rejection that I will face is not worth the effort of putting together a cover letter. I think I am going to talk to someone at the career center about this fear and learn how to sell myself in a postive light, cause I sure as hell can't do it on my own without help. I need to get out, but have no way to do it. I am going to washington this weekend though. That makes me happy.

I miss Gregg like crazy and its affecting my moods. I get mad at him for little things. I need to do more, be more involved. When I am around people, I don't think about it, but when I am alone I dwell on things and it makes me sad.
Oh well I need to get dressed and somehow find some energy.
Anna
Saturday, January 20th, 2007
3:14 am
So why does this bother me? I ask someone to call and they don't. Hey thats old hat. I'm used to that. Am I being unreasonable for asking someone to make some form of contact at least once a day. Am I going out on a limb asking for this. Oh yeah and am I going out on a limb to have someone who soposetly loves you to forgo the out of sight out of mind rule. If you want this relationship to be open, say it baby. If all you're in this for is the fringe benefits then let me know. You're making me look like the bad guy in this one. The one who is calling your house at 3:00am asking where you are. URGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tuesday, September 5th, 2006
2:31 pm
T-Minus 1 day
I apologize about the lack of updates, but I have been running around like a chicken with my head cutoff for the past few weeks getting ready to leave. In approximately 36 hours I will be leaving behind all that is comfortable and known to me and will replace it with a new set of memories and experiences. These past few weeks, which have been spent preparing myself emotionally for my departure, have made me realize how close I truly am to some people in my life, and how others are mere acquaintances. In additional, I have learned that if I follow my heart and do not give up on my intuition great things can come from it. It is amazing how refusing to lose track of someone can lead you to a great friend, a comrade, and one of the most amazing people I have ever met. I am becoming more content, that spending 3.5 months away from everyone I care about will allow us to become closer, and the changes we endure during that time will strengthen our bond, albeit physically (well in the case of one person ) and emotionally. I also know that there is a good chance that one or two people in my life right now will no longer be apart of it and am saddened by the immediate possibly of their passing, but am content that I was able to see them through their best years. I nor anyone else in my life knows what the future will hold and what my leaving the country will bring. Will I still be my free-spirited self just a little more worldly, a little more aware, a little more mature or will I become a different person entirely? Will I finally find out my calling in life, or be left wondering and still searching for the events which lead to this amazing opprunity and the purpose behind them? These are question which will have to be re-explored and reexamined come December of 2006 and the months and years which follow.
Saturday, August 19th, 2006
12:16 am
An interesting change of events
So Thursday,I recieved a phone call from my old boss asking me to help them with a new project at $8 per hour + $1 per signature that we get over 30. Only a week before, I was going bananas figuring out how I was going to pay for all of my stuff for Kenya while still having some to bring with me to purchase items for myself and my friends and family. After going in today I found out that they will need people to continue on with the campaign until novemeber at the rate we were paid when the campaign ended. What a welcome relief it is to have a little cushion to allow myself to not worry so much about money while I am in a foregin country.

The best part about working was seeing firmilar faces which I have not seen for over a month. Working today made me realize that it was not the job and money I liked, but the people that I worked with that allowed me to come into work day after day. Unfourntantly, working on the campaign again made me realize how much I miss a specific person. Over a couple of weeks I developed a friendship with someone that I thought could develop into something more. Here was a way cool, chill, inteilgent, awesome person who kept asking me out to do things. Given my messed up experiences with men, be they friendships, relationships, crushes, etc I have been learning to listen to my inturtion and read people given the vibes they send out, and this man was sending out some pretty strong postive vibes. All would be well, given the fact that someone, somewhere, knew where he was and what he was doing. His phone has been disconnected for over a month and the email which my boss gave me keeps boucing back. Its not like anything romanticly could happen in the 2 weeks I'm still in the country, but a phone call or email letting me know he was ok would be nice, and a chance to see a friend before I head out on a life altering journey would be even better.
Saturday, August 12th, 2006
1:35 am
Anexity about leaving and What not
The recent news about the terror plot and the arrival of a letter containing the names and the addresses of the students with whom I will be spending the next three months with, have made me recongize some of the underlying anexities that I about this trip.

Yesterday morning, I was awaken by my mother with the news that there was a foiled terror plot to blow up 6-10 jets over the alantic ocean, all of which were departing from London Heathrow Airport. As many of you do not know, my flight plan includes catching a connecting flight to Narobi from this airport, so I was extremely nervous and spent the vast majority of yesterday morning in front of the tv watching CNN. The new carry-on baggage rules illicted quite a responce from me, because ever since my stool was returned to me in pieces, and many of the items which were covered with fragile stickers were returned to me with some degree of damage, I do not trust valuable items to baggage claim, espically on international flights. Now, under these new rules (given that they do not change in the next 28 days or so) I will be required to check close to $3000 worth of electronic equipment, including a lap top, 7.2 megapixel digital zoom camera, a 30G ipod, a pair of binoculars, and an electric converson kit. To top it off, I will not be able to take an additional change of clothes and a bag of toiletries be that my bags get lost. Losing bags ranks up with missing a flight on the list on anexity attack triggers for me.

In addition to this, I am feeling rather inadquate in regards to my academic credentials for this trip. All but one student on this trip is a biology and/or environmental major and many hail from some of the best schools for environmental programs in the country, or flat out ivy league schools. I have done ok in my undergraduate courses, but since the majority of my friends are not biology or environmental majors nor have a strong intrest in these areas (not that this is,by any means, an insult, to them)these topics do not emerge as everyday topics of discussion and I feel that the concepts that I learn in class oftentimes go in one ear and out the other. My experience in finding an internship this summer (which did not pan out) and researching admission standards for graduate schools also helps to reinfornce this inadquacy that I am feeling. To top it off, many of the students with whom I will be traveling, are active in biological internships and experiences this summer. It is my fear that I will fail all the tests and waste a large sum of my parents money, and a large amount of my time while making myself look like a fool to all these other students.
Friday, August 4th, 2006
12:22 am
Grad Schools and Book Recomendations
I am looking into applying to Grad Schools for conservation science/biology/wildlife mangement or conservation education. Does anyone have any suggestions.


Also, I am spending some time abroad this fall and it is recomended that we bring some light reading along. Can anyone recomend some good conservation/enviroment books that are entertaining and not too text book like. I've read Silent Spring, Living Downstream, and own a copy of The Land Ethic, but have yet to read it.
Saturday, July 22nd, 2006
1:12 pm






What religion suits you?




Buddhism: Buddhism is a religion which has its beginnings with Siddharta Gautama, a prince who gave up material possessions in order to meditate, always searching for the reasons of life. He came up with the Four Noble Truths and the Eightfold Path, things which also Buddhists live by. Siddharta became known as the Buddha, and despite those fat, bald little Buddhas you may have seen, looked nothing like them. Buddhists generally believe in a passive way of life, giving up material possessions in the search for truth and enlightenment. This is usually done through hours and hours of meditation.
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Thursday, July 13th, 2006
12:05 am
One more reason to hate/love public transit and other comments on life as I know it
So I ran into this really cute guy at a bus stop and the bus came before I could introduce myself and my number. Damn COTA bus. Took away my husband. The guy at planet smoothie was cute too, but not as cute as bus stop boy. I seriously need to find something to fulfil needs. This is getting ridiclous. My birthday was yesterday. I think all I recived was a 5 pound weight gain from all the food I ate at cheesecake factory. So given the cureent weight that makes it about 10 pounds I lost so far. There is a rumor that the kid I liked got fired from work. Oh well serves him right for not returning my phone calls. I miss BG and parting. Maybe Theresa and I's misson to locate hot scuessful men to use for the summer will be scuessful. One problem, where will we take these men? Neither of us has our own place, and I seriously doubt my parents would aprove of me bringing some man I met at a bar to their home for a 36odd night stand. Yes kids, good sex= lots of sex and we all want that don't we. Lots of good sex=happy Anna. Throw some wine and a bowl in there and now we're talking ;-) My grandma gave me $50 for my bday wonder what that will end up going towards. I want a tatoo, maybe that will pay for it. Work sucked today. When it ended I felt like I had been on the elpicial for 10000000057 minutes. Seriously though I walked from Hubbard St. to Goodale Ave and back 15 times. Ironies make me laugh, people make me laugh, stupid people make me laugh. There are alot of hot men in columbus, I realized that. Too bad I don't go to Ohio State so I can suduce them all cause everyone wantS a piece of a firey German redhead yowzers!!! I get paid on friday. Maybe I'll pick up a lacaste polo at Dr. Mojos or some other overpriced item of clothing there. They are having a "summer sale" which means that an item that would orgianlly be $250 is now $200 WHAT A MUTHA FUCKING DEAL!!!!! I think I would not be able to function without sarcam and the word "fuck". They need to make vuglarities ananomious. I could be the charter member. "Sorry Mom, its not me, its the Ani Difranco tapes I kept on repeat throughout high school. All the pent up anger I keep inside causes me to lash out with vulgar comments" I want to have Ben Harper's illegitamate children. If he knocks me up maybe, just maybe I could get into his concert on August 30th for free. Note to self, add get knocked up by Ben Harper to personal to-do list. Most music sucks, and people who refuse to open their minds to other types of music other than the comerical bull-shit they play on top 40 radio piss me off (yes I am refering to my sister here). Is to really to much to ask for someone to turn on NPR once a goddamn year and actually listen to a morning show not filled with mindless sexist, racist, vulgar jokes but insted inteligent humor which most of its educated listening audicence finds quite amusing. Seriously one can only take so much shitty comerical hip hop in one day. If she wants to listen to hip hop go to a fucking Ordinary Peoples concert or talk to my friends who are DJ's. That my dear is Hip Hop. Unfourntally they have to dumb it down for the common listening audience who prides themself on "being gangsta" in their suburban homes and parents suvs. I think I have fallen off my soapbox and the suds have made it so I can not get back on.
Peace Ya'll catch ya on the flip side
Saturday, July 8th, 2006
1:42 pm
meme
(Click here to post your own answers for this meme.)

I miss somebody right now. I don't watch much TV these days. I own lots of books.
× I wear glasses or contact lenses. × I love to play video games. I've tried marijuana.
I've watched porn movies. × I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship. I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
I curse sometimes. I have changed a lot mentally over the last year. × I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
it goes on...Collapse )
12:56 pm
Dear Ohio Legislaters, Please quit taking away my freedoms
Its weird how stupid laws can totally ruin an experience for you. Columbus has passed this ridiclous new law that you can no longer smoke in any indoor establishment, including bars, clubs, and concert halls. I understand the purpose of the new law, but when 75% of the people at the Newport, a concert hall, miss the concert to go outside and smoke a cigeratte or pass around a bowl or what not, this seems to be an issue. To top it off you can't even bring your beer outside. Last night I had to chug a 32oz beer before going outside to smoke with my friends. Do you understand how much I wanted to puke after that. Seriously people, even if you don't smoke (which I do not on a constant basis) vote in November to restore our freedom to kill ourselves. It is one thing to outlaw smoking in resturants, cafes, and food establishments where the crowd often includes family, older folks, and children, but to outlaw this at bars is assanine. First off, anyone who has ever been to a bar knows that often times people smoke when they drink, yet do not at other times (generally speaking this is myself. Second, to get into most bars, you have to be 18 (or even 21). At this age people are old enough to make decisions on rather or not to smoke and to visit establishments which do not permit smoking.

The problem with smoking inside comes to the layout of the bars, not the smokers themselves. Bars and clubs like the Newport and Howards in Bowling Green are very poorly venahilated get extremely hot and unsafe when crowded. The fact that bars like this have not been condemed due to violations of fire code is crazy. That is the real safety issue, not a person's exposure to second hand smoke. So I am begging you to please vote to bring back our freedoms in November.
Wednesday, July 5th, 2006
12:52 am
Camera for wildlife photography
Hi all. I am not sure that this is the best place to ask a question regarding a camera, but hey who knows. I need to purchase a digital camera with a high powered zoom for my trip to kenya in the fall. Due to budget constrants I can spend no more than $1000 on the entire package (lens(es), bag, body, insurance, waranty). Should I invest in an SLR or is there a less expensive option out there? Also, I am not a photographer (at least not a trained one) so I am looking for something that is pretty user friendly. Send me your suggestions
:-D Anna
Sunday, July 2nd, 2006
9:48 pm
Hook a sista up
Does some nice person wanna send a bag my way so I can forget about everything for a few hours? I'd drink every last ounce of alcholic beverage in my house, but alas those have calories and I'm trying to lose weight. Plus a hangover is not something I am looking forward too. I've got a pack minus 4 marbolo reds in my backpack, but thats too obvious. Please someone shoot me right now. I just got paid so I'll send you the money for the gun.
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